How to create a favicon.ico...

Ok so WHAT IS a favicon.ico? Look up at your address bar.  See that icon to the left of it?  That is called a favicon short for favorite icon.  These show up in tabs, bookmarks, and next to the address bar.  These are handy little tools to help "mark" your website and just give it a little something extra.  Also, I think they are pretty neat in general.  Doing them is a LOT easier than it sounds too.

First off I recommend downloading this 100% free program called Photobie. I have been using this program for a couple years and I have to say, it's pretty amazing for free. And no, I am not getting paid or bribed to say this.  Although maybe I should because I think I tell EVERYONE about it!

Keep in mind that some images just won't look good at 16x16 pixels, which is what a favicon is.

Ok, so you have downloaded photobie (or a program that can do the following). Open your image up in the program then go to file>save as and name it favicon and instead of gif or jpg pic the ico extension.  Make sure this has NO CAPS.  Go to your websites file directory and upload the file in the documents section, not the images section.  I use Microsoft Live Web as my directory because it is free and you have a great amount of free space available.

Once it is uploaded to your site of choice it should look something like this: http://jocelynbrown.web.officelive.com/Documents/favicon.ico

Now in your html code find /head and RIGHT ABOVE IT put this code :



Easy Shmeezy Neck Wraps

I started making these neck wraps about a year ago, and while these pictures do not do it justice (would LOVE a professional camera-but that won't happen for awhile) they are still cute in my book.

Go to your local fabric store like JoAnnes and find the section of PRECUT quilt squares.  Only get cotton materials and avoid fabrics like fleece and velvet as they do not do well in the microwave.

Take your favorite one (or all) and fold it lengthwise with the pattern facing inward like so:
At the fold, with fabric scissors cut upward as straight as you can. I never get it perfect and it doesn't have to be.

Take one half and set aside. With the other half, again fold in half lengthwise, pattern facing inward.  I suggest a sewing machine to sew these but I have done them by hand before. They just take longer. Sew from the bottom, up the side, and to the top but leaving about an inch unsewn like this:
So as you are looking at it, it is inside out so you want to, through the hole, turn it right side out like how it is in the picture above.  Take the unsewn corner and fold it over and down so the top resembles a triangle like this:
Where my finger is is a good place to put a button so that it is holding piece down. So you would put the hole where my finger is and underneath on the not-folded piece of material you would sew the button. The reason I do this is because I use these wraps ALL the time when I am sick and with this button I can empty out the rice to refill it for different scents and wash the material.  If you want you can just sew the hole up entirely.  I put mine in the microwave for no more than 1 minute otherwise it will get to hot and your button can melt.

These make great gifts, they are easy to make, and they are from the heart. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do!

Budgeting Basics and Tips

It took me and my husband 2 years of very poor spending to realize that regardless of how much you make you ALWAYS need to keep track of your expenses and have a budget.  We didn't keep track of the outgo vs ingo and now we are climbing our way out of debt. But we learned early enough that we can thankfully fix it before we eventually retire.  As far as actual budgeting goes there are a few things I would like to point out:
Having a system is KEY! I use an excel spreadsheet similar to this one HERE. I have no clue where I found this from as it has been sitting in my documents for quite some time.  Mine is more detailed however and has four tabs in my excel sheet.  The first tab is our monthly expenses, the second is our debts that we are paying off, third is all our login info for bills (which I recommend password protecting if you let others use your computer), and I keep what I call a Temporary register.  I sit down twice a month and pay bills.  Each time I do so I go into that tab and at the top type in what our balance is. Then I type out what bill I just paid, how much it was, and the balance after.  This way I can keep an eye on the bank account to make sure it all goes through. Once it does I erase it for the next set of bill paying.  I also on the first tab of monthly expenses have a color code.  If the balance is in black it is paid on time no problem. If it is in red we are late or owe on that bill, purple means it is not yet due but I know how much it will be so I can plan ahead, and blue means it is taken out of the account automatically every month.  I suggest if you are trying really hard to get a handle on your finances and budget to do it manually for a few months so you can see where it all goes first hand. And if you have a bill that takes out every month that overdrafts your account every time, you need to fix that.  That being said here is how you start this process:
1.  Sit down (if you can or have one, with your partner) and gather up ALL your monthly billing statements.  Things that are due EVERY MONTH (or like one of mine, every other month) like your utilities, mortgage/rent, phone, etc.  Sometimes you have to look online at your account to get this information if you are doing estatements so do not forget about those. Here is what is should resemble:

Company	Date Due	MARCH
Daycare	1	$120.00
Mortgage	1	$0.00
Dish Network	11	$0.00
Time Warner	12	$8.72

So you have the company you pay to, the date in which it is due (and if you notice I list them in order) then under the month in which I have to pay them how much I owe. After a few months of doing this you also start to see trends in your bills. Some are higher than others in certain times of the year, others are consistent which helps you get a baseline for your finances should you get overcharged for something at some point.  You will see a red flag when the amount due is higher than normal. This is actually a funny month for me to be giving an example because we were ahead in our mortgage, that was our first month of Dish so it was free and I overpaid Time Warner the month before so that is all I owed lol. I promise you, my bills look NOTHING like that lol.  Moving on.

Your second step is to sit down and add up (bank statements come in handy for this) how much you spend per month on NON bill things.  Such as groceries, eating out (this is separate from groceries), clothes, shoes, etc.  Things that you know you need/want but you do not actually get a bill once a month to pay it. An example would be:

	March
Clothes	20
Eating out	50
Groceries	600

If you have a hard time knowing what you spend your money on, look at your bank statements, start saving receipts, and sometimes you can get your financial institution to provide you with a breakdown of the previous years expense report which will show you restaurants, grocery stores, clothing, etc. Our credit card does this and seeing 60% going into eating out was an EYE OPENER!  But we were living out of a hospital room..and that is another blog for another time.

Now that you have those two tasks done, add up what you make each month.  What is your AFTER TAXES income?  Add your monthly bills separate of your NON bill expenses.  Now compare those two numbers with your income.  Are you scared yet?  I was.  You think on a daily basis "it's only 10 dollars" but those dollars add up.  Ever gone to the dollar store and next thing you know you spent fifty bucks?  The whole time you kept thinking "wow this is only a dollar!" and you walk out fifty dollars poorer.  How many of those things did you NEED?  It took me a LONG time to get out of that habit.  Now I talk myself out of everything and it drives my husband nuts lol.

Looking at those numbers, what can you cut?  Do you HAVE to have the QUICKEST internet just to facebook?  Do you have that quick internet for gaming?  Cutting out the gaming and lowering your internet can save you anywhere from 20-50 dollars per month depending on your internet provider and gaming costs if you have any.  What about your cell phone plan.  Do you need 1400 minutes? Are you even using those? Look at your usage for a lot of your expenses and you will notice you can cut back a lot.  I got rid of my blackberry because I am a stay at home mom so I have my computer handy and do not need internet.  By doing that I save 30 a month.  Now they have tiered plans which aids in that amount but I still do not need that excess.  Do you go out to Starbucks EVERYDAY?  Limit yourself to once a week and find a local coffee stand to purchase from.  These little places are privately owned so that money is going right back into your community, most of them have punch cards where you can earn a free one, and the prices tend to be lower.  Also when you become a regular the girls actually make an effort to get to know you where at Starbucks sometimes they do not care as much.  I will make another blog about some more money saving tips, but this is a good start for you.

I hope that this helps and you find that there IS a light at the end of the tunnel of debt.  It can be a little overwhelming at first, but do not be afraid to seek help from financial advisers, your bank, or even a family or friend!

GOOD LUCK!

Mommy Meltdown

Ok moms, I hope you can relate to this and I am not just crazy. But today has to be one of those days where you think to yourself "Why the hell did I become a mom?! I can't take ANYMORE!" I should have known that when I could not get to sleep before 1 am last night/this morning today was going to not be all that great. Then I got up with baby at 4:45 am and could not get back to sleep when I put him back down at 5:30am. So I became Twitter-pated and tweeted to my hearts content.  My kids rolled out of bed at 8 and I was thinking "hey this is pretty cool" because who doesn't like it when their kids sleep in?? So I go to make oatmeal for breakfast for them because I am out of just about everything in my kitchen since I didn't go shopping last week because of my vacation. I have no milk. Oatmeal made with water....ugh. So now, here I am tired, irritated at my empty kitchen and drinking a cup of left-over-coffee from yesterday because I haven't had a chance to make more (Hey don't judge...I was DESPERATE for some caffeine) and my 4 yr old says "I don't feel good my tummy hurts". He says this ALL the time. Seriously. He even said it first thing when he woke up this morning.  I have learned to say "Oh I'm sorry Ryley" and I smile and kiss his tummy all better.  Well this morning apparently he meant it. He started puking. Lovely. I have to get my 2 month old to his 2 month check up at 1030 in the morning, its now 830 and my oldest is puking. I can't reschedule because I have already rescheduled once and I REALLY needed to talk to the dr about his serious issue of constant crying and I knew his lack of weight gain would be an issue.  Call my mom. She can't take him because she has to go see her elderly grandfather and take him some items from the store. Well...he seemed fine the rest of the morning...until we are literally walking out the door and to the bathroom he runs. More puking. Joy. We are going to the drs anyways, so I guess it is fitting.  Now, I live in northern Idaho and like most of the US we keep getting slammed with snow. And, also probably like most of the US, people can't seem to figure out how to drive and park in this stuff.  Parking lot was a disaster...I had to park a mile away (ok so maybe a 1/4 mile but with 2 small children and a car seat, whats the difference right?).  Now the snow is melty and gross in the parking lot leaving behind BIG puddles...I have boys...do you see where this is going? If not here :
SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH alllll the way to the front door. Joy some more. I then proceed to check in where I chew the girls out for there stupidity in my co-pays (saying I had none then sending me a bill for a hundred bucks in co-pays and telling me it's my fault...when it clearly states on my card and they argued with me I didn't have one). I'm already heated and the stupidity and horrible customer service these front girls project just kind of added fuel to my simmering fire. Get your head out of your keester and do your damn job. And don't talk to me like I am an idiot.  I did your job for 5+ years ditz. AAAAAnyways.  We get back into our little room and I started getting a little weepy with the nurse letting her know how very unsatisfied I am with those front girls. I figure after 4 years of being the perfect damn patients mom, I can throw a stink about this, right? Now, keep in mind, my 4 year old is whiney from not feeling good, my 2 year old NEVER is quiet (when he is not talking noise comes out constantly....who put the damn batteries in him I'll never know but if I find out I'm going to kick their ass), and my 2 month old who refuses to really gain weight (and my 2 yr old had failure to thrive his first year of life...ugh) also refuses to STOP CRYING. The nurse leaves and I am waiting for the dr to come in and my 4 yr old threatens more puking so I have him kneel on the stool and keep his head in the sink. Here we are, his head in the sink, yelling at my 2 yr old to stop standing in front of the door, and the baby who won't stop screaming...I'm walking birth control. You have a hormonal, over-worked, emotional, married yet single mother, on ONE cup of STALE coffee who HAS HAD ENOUGH.  Still with me? Now they give my baby his shots, samples of the new OVERPRICED Nutramigen formula which my 2 yr old was on his first year too, and we get sent on our merry way.  Back through that parking lot of puddles. SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH. Curses under breath.

Needless to say I just came home. I am still out of milk. And all other foods. We are down to rice and frozen fruit mix. Oh and crackers, I have a crap-ton of crackers. I also am pretty sure after today I AM crackers.

I can't be ALL complainy because the little old lady next door has been having her son snowblow the copious amounts of snow in my driveway.  And I had a coupon for a free coffee at my favorite coffee place called Dutch Bros. But still. It is only 1230 pm and I am debating on curling up under the covers and sucking my thumb into a self soothing coma.

Ok. Now I can go back to being the perky annoyance you all know and roll your eyes at =)

I just HAVE to tell you my NEW love!

So I went to my in laws for 4 days for the Thanksgiving holiday.  On Saturday night I decided to make a left-over turkey pot pie (they smoke there turkey too...so that alone is mouth-watering).  Well, after 20 minutes of searching the kitchen for all the tools I needed (they were at a wedding so I couldn't ask questions) I started my pot pie.  Now, a little back story...I have a HUGE problem with rolling pins.  I have a wooden rolling pin that I have used for 2 years and this sucker refuses to season.  No matter what you do, it sticks to EVERYTHING.  After ruining many-o pie crusts and cookie rollouts I gave in and bought another one.  This one was one from target and has that no stick surface. Well. It sucked and stuck.  No matter WHAT I did.  Now I watched my mom baking as I grew up so I know the little tricks of the trade for these issues but NOTHING worked.  Now, back to present, er Saturday.  I pull out my MIL's rolling pin, which btw weighs at LEAST 10 pounds, and I start rolling my crust expecting, like usual, for it to stick, for me to fight, curse, and ten minutes later FINALLY get it in the dish. But...NO STICK. Seriously. I didn't do a darn thing and this pin just went at it like crazy. What was the pin you say?
Marble Rolling Pin!














Now I cannot tell you the EXACT brand of her rolling pin because she got it as a wedding gift a gazillion years ago...but I CAN tell you from my research that the marble is the key element.  She hasn't seasoned it, and she really only bakes for holidays as she works 12 hour days.  I'm SO in love that I am going to use some of my Swagbucks to buy some Amazon gift cards to buy this sucker. So I will be getting it for free since I have 4300 SBs and that buys more than enough $5 gift cards since they cost only 450 SB's! BRILLIANT!

A Shopping/Todo list paper

http://imarockstarmom2.blogspot.com/2010/11/winter-theme-shoppingtodo-list.htmlIf you are like me, you tend to be busy but love staying organized.  I created a shopping and tolist template all on the same page so you have all you need in one handy spot!  More designs to come!

A new take on recipe cards

So as I was filling out some of my cards today with all the newer recipes I love, I came up with a new design for a card.  So I rushed over to the computer and VOILA! A new style was created.  I did it in my FAVORITE blue, and I hope you like it too (hey I rhymed!)

No lines version:



With lines version:

HOPE YOU LIKE!

Children and Chores...

Chore Chart

Using a chore chart with kids is a BRILLIANT idea! For every chore my child completes I put a star in correct row under the correct day column.  At the very end of the row at the end of the week I sit down with them and we together count the stars.  At the very bottom I write down how many stars gets you what rewards. For example:
5 stars gets you a sticker
10 stars gets you an extra half hour of tv time
15 stars gets you a cookie after lunch
20 stars gets you a toy of your choice under $10

You obviously can make up your own rewards, but this is great for them to see that they get rewarded for helping out!  Tomorrow (er later today seeing as how it is 12:20 in the morning eek) I will post a blog about what chores are good for what ages of children!  Click on the pic and then right click and save.
ENJOY!
If you do not like this one there are more templates HERE.  And more in the future as well!

Oooooo how I love a good cleaning day!

I LOVE to clean my house, but I have A LOT of house to clean and so I have to make it as easy as possible (and quick too!) So I have one of those AMAZING cleaning caddys! I got mine at Target for 9 bucks and it has a spot to hold your paper towel roll (and a slit to for easy dispensing!). I thought I would share with you what is IN my caddy that I take around with me that makes cleaning a breeze!


OK so the things IN the caddy are Febreeze Allergen Reducer, Spray Bleach, White Vinegar Water in a store bought Spray Bottle, Rubber Gloves, Dust Spray, toothbrush, eye makeup remover,a small broom and dustpan, and rags.
I spray the Febreeze on curtains and carpets to help keep the allergens down in my house, especially in the spring!
The spray bleach is for bathroom surfaces like sinks, counters, tubs, and the BACK and BOTTOM of the toilet, NOT inside...more on that later =)
The vinegar water mix is what I was all my windows and metal surfaces with.  It leaves a streak free shine and has no chemicals so it's safe to use around the kids. It just stinks for a bit ;)
The Rubber Gloves is for gross things I come across.  I have boys and a husband so I sometimes never know what I am getting myself into when I am cleaning!
Dust spray is obvious lol. And safe for all my wood items since I got it WITH my wood furniture at the furniture store itself.
The toothbrush is for the surfaces/areas you need a little extra scrubbing help with!
The eye makeup remover is GREAT for those sticky surfaces you tend to find that kids leave behind...and it's a lot safer to use than all the other chemical based products. I LOVE IT! I also use the toothbrush with the remover on the inside top part of my washer to get away the gunk that tends to build up.
The broom and dustpan...also an obvious one. My bathrooms are easier for me to sweep that way than drag the dang broom around the house.  I also mop my floors on hands and knees!
The stuff NOT in the caddy:
Lysol toilet boil cleaner- I get these at Costco in a pack of 4.  I have 3 bathrooms so this way I can keep one in each bathroom and have one extra so when 1 runs out.  I love this system because I only have to buy them once every 6 months or so.
The bleach wipes are for surfaces that are REALLY germy/gross.  This way I am not putting all those germs into my rag I am using.  So like the toilet seat and handle, light switches, doorknobs, etc.  With kids I try to keep my house as germ-free as possible.  Especially during flu and cold season.  I try not to use them that much because I like to be as green as possible, but I am also a SAHM of 3 boys so I need to make things easy as well.  These are also great for when my kids go potty and have an accident on the floor...its a quick sanitize for the area they messed =)
The bottle on the far right is Armstrong floor cleaner.  My mom got me hooked on this after I kept complaining about how every product left my floors sticky and residuey no matter how little/much of it I used.  It smells great, you don't need much, and it REALLY gets the job done!


Now you know what I use, but WHEN do I use it?  Well I was SOOO tired of being overwhelmed with cleaning on top of daily stuff on top of all that stuff you have to do once a month, so I made a chart! Here is my example for September.  Somehow though I end up doing laundry EVERY DAY, but on those designated days is when I end up putting it all away lol!

Well, I hope that this helps!  If you have any questions, you know where I will be (probably cleaning!)

Jocelyn

ALL WRONG!

Today has not gone at all how I had hoped. In fact, today was flat out crummy. I had HUGE plans for blog posting today and things I wanted to share with you all, however that was all derailed when I took on the task of changing up my profile and making my own template. I also made my own logo which I am not entirely please with yet. But ALL my programs kept crashing so that really threw me off today.

I did want to share something though that I learned yesterday. I was at Hobby Lobby for the FIRST time (I know how exciting!) and my mom informed me why my piping was all..well...&#*@$&%. I was using a #2 tip...yeah oops. I didn't know. I didn't even think about it. So, I learned my lesson. So I thought that tonight I would make some cookies with my new cookie cutter that is the shape of a baby bottle and practice on those since my mom has a baby shower to go to tomorrow. The cookies didn't even freaking turn out. WTH!? I didn't do anything different than I usually do. Today is so not my day. So I am drinking a glass of wine which will turn into a bottle of wine by the end of the night. And tomorrow I will start over and share with you all the lovely things I want to post!

Have a better night than me!
Jocelyn

My organizing turns into graphic design?

Well I am a freak about organization.  This includes how I store my recipes.  I was using this cute little three ring binder FOR recipes that I bought at Borders but there is something about it that drives me CRAZY.  I don't like how it is set up and it seems so....meh.  So I searched and scowered online to find a template for recipe cards (I just got an ADORABLE recipe box today at Hobby Lobby that I am BEYOND thrilled about).  So there I was searching, drinking wine, and NOT finding a THING I liked. BOO. So I thought hey, I can make my own, then I get EXACTLY what I want.  And while they are not perfect, I LOVE them. Now, I am a sucker for black and white.  It is clean and crisp (oh yeah and CHEAPER lol).  Damask is my favorite pattern so I did a black damask recipe card.  If you would like it send me your email and I will send you the pdf format. I have two versions. I have one that has 2 sides.

Have a good one!

Breakfast For Dinner For Adults (Don't worry the kids love it too!)

I don't know about you guys, but I LOVE breakfast and I LOVE having breakfast for dinner.  Tonight, however, I wanted dinner for dinner but for it to taste like breakfast.  Don't worry, I never really make sense.  But I knew what I wanted and sometimes that's a good start!

So I sauteed about 2 medium onions on a large skillet
When they were almost done I added 6 cut up slices of turkey bacon
When those were done I added 2 TBSP of flour and a splash of EVOO and mixed them up
Add 2 cups of milk and let it heat ups then added 3-4 cups shredded cheese
I let that melt together and then added 3-4 cups of freshly shredded hashbrowns. 
2 eggs over that and mixed in thuroughly and throw in oven for about 25 minutes.


ENJOY!

Self destruction or human nature?

Here I sit on my couch eating my yogurt mixed with granola, waiting for my coffee press to finish making my morning addiction, in awe of how suddenly quiet my house is compared to just ten minutes ago.  Ten minutes ago was the wind down of an hour long cry from my 8 week old.  An hour of inconsolable tears with a free side of bottom lip quivering.  It was one of those moments where nothing you do soothes him and you think to yourself "I did this to myself on purpose!?" I then thought "is having children self destruction on your sanity or is it just human nature to reproduce and we forget all the bad because the good is so good?"  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being a mother...but who LOVES having an infant scream from the top of their lungs? So here you are in your bedrooms walk in closet with the door shut just so that the baby doesn't wake up the older two! I am suddenly singing lullaby's and changing the words to "please do NOT wake up the 2 and 4 year old".  The 2 year old was up until midnight telling me his tummy hurt and by the time I crawled into my comfy bed I couldn't sleep.  I lay there staring at the ceiling, tossing from side to side, and I almost actually got up to make cookies because it just seemed like the thing to when one has a bout of insomnia, right?  So, yes, I am a sleep deprived mother who will gladly make daddy take over when he comes home from work....in JANUARY. Again I think I must have a love for self destruction but I really love my husband so it evens out in the end.  Well, so much for the quiet house.  The other two are up.  I really wanted to go to Target and a few other stores today but we got our first snow and even though I live in Northern Idaho where snow is natural occurrence in the cold months people still drive like 7 year olds who stole their parents car.  That and I am so tired that I am afraid in my zombie like state I might leave a child in the toy section of Target. And I won't lie, some days I fantasize about that.  I have to hand it to the movie Sex and the City 2 for the scene where they talk about being a mom how it is.  That no matter how much you love your children you have days where you think "WHY!? WHY DID I DO THIS!?"

Well the coffee is done and the miniature humans are in need of something breakfast like.  And here starts another day.

What's in a name!

Ok so while my layout is changing a lot these days (I am going to create my own in interim I need something that doesn't drive me up a wall) my name has too. Now I did something today I swore I would never do...I made a twitter account. You are probably thinking one of 2 things right now...1) "YOU ARE JUST NOW GETTING A TWITTER!?" Yes, I have not had a need for one until now. It is going to be hard to be heard and help people if no one has a clue I exist. 2) Traitor. Damn skippy. Now, moving on. I picked I Am A Rockstar Mom BECAUSE *drum-roll please* I try to keep in that frame of mind that I can do anything I set my mind too. And for some reason a rock star is somewhat empowering...and sweaty which is something I wont mimic. So there it is. You won't be seeing me going to town on a guitar (unless it is a cookie!) but I want to be a strong voice for those who cannot speak.

Thanks
Rockstar Jocelyn

Fantastic, delicious, and easy!

So when my husband goes away to work for long periods of time (like his 60 day trip he is currently on) I try and send him baked goodies. Well I was blessed not to long ago by my wonderful mother in law who got me a Kitchenaid Mixer! I have wanted one for about 10 years and I have to say, IT WAS WORTH EVERY MINUTE I WAITED! That being said, I am constantly trying to find new things to make and sending my husband a goodie package was one of them. I need to make cookies that will last in an airtight container for at least a weeks time and they have to taste good. I am a picky cookie person myself as I do not like like a dry cookie. It has to be moist and not all crumbly. So while searching for said new recipes I came across a blogger's site that is officially my favorite and an inspiration to me and my kitchen! http://bakeat350.blogspot.com/ is a great place for cookies! I used her recipe for homemade oreos and while I did not make them as thick as she did, they came out TASTY! (I copied this from her amazing website so that I didn't mess it up lol). I would like to change this recipe a tad as I personally feel the chocolate level is not up to par...granted they are beyond heavenly but I want some more chocolate all up in my cookie experience. I will update more on that when I do it! Oh yes, and I did not had the espresso as I did not have any and I didn't want to chance them coming out with any coffee taste since my husband does not like coffee at all...I know crazy right?! ANYWAYS....

Chocolate Cut-Out Cookies
{modified from Cookie Craft}

2 & 1/2 c. all-purpose, unbleached flour
1/2 c. dutch-process cocoa (natural is OK, too)
1 tsp instant espresso powder
1/2 tsp. coarse salt
1 c. unsalted butter
1 c. sugar
1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla

Preheat oven to 350. Line baking sheets with parchment paper.

Whisk together the flour,cocoa, espresso powder and salt; set aside.

Cream together the butter and sugar until light an fluffy. Beat in the egg and vanilla until well combined.

In 3 additions, add the flour mixture at low speed. Scrape down sides and bottom of bowl as needed.

Roll the dough on a lightly floured and cocoa-ed surface. (I mixed the 2 of these, then spread on my rolling surface, on my rolling pin, and used it to dip my cookie cutters.)

Cut the cookies with a cookie cutter and if necessary, using a scraper.

Freeze cut cookies five minutes.

Bake 8 minutes. Let cool completely.

Here was my adventure!


Cut and ready to be put on a baking sheet! The tool I used for this:
It lets me transfer cookies from the counter to the baking sheet with ease =)

Now I have never made Royal Icing before so this was an interesting experience for me. There are lots of different ways to make royal icing I am finding out, but I will do a separate blog about that! So here are the finished cookies!

And here is my brutal attempt at piping letters...which I should have known wasn't going to be all that pretty when I could barely trace the outline of my heart shaped cookies ha.


So while they look like someone who has never done this before has done this...go figure...they taste out of this world. I am going to mess around with different combo's of filling for these bad boys and shapes/decorating. I will keep you updated on how that goes. I also want to start messing around with cupcakes but I think I need to master the cookie first. Then I will move on!

Bearing my "fat" soul

So the purpose of this blog is not just for me to get my feelings out and feel better. While it is that, it is also an outlet of discussion for people who are either going through the same thing, feeling the same thing, or simply like a recipe that I have posted. I have not posted as much as I want the last couple days so I need to catch up on all the things I want to share. First off, I would like to share a blog I wrote on Sparkpeople.com. This is a website to help in weight loss and getting healthy. If you want to join my name is Myfadedrainbow on there and I would love for you to friend me. Well, here it was.

My bathroom is officially a war zone. I was derailed for a few days with a war injury: my ego. See, in my bathroom there is a scale. This scale taunts me every time I go in. And when I step on it and I have gained 2 pounds in a matter of 6 hours, it is beyond frustrating for me because it takes me 2 days to lose it again. I don't understand how my body can fluctuate so much. Now, a smart person would say "Hey dummy get the scale out of the bathroom" but I can't. I have tried. I got it out at one point and then 2 hours later there it was again, in my bathroom, giving me "the look".

Like a meth-addict, I keep relapsing into "comfortable routines". I have figured out that when I do not see immediate results (I know this is not a genius move and it is not realistic) I get frustrated and think "well when I do not exercise and be strict with myself I know the outcome...nothing" Sometimes preparing yourself and doing it on purpose is better than trying with everything you have and still getting nothing. If I work hard and get nothing, and do nothing and get nothing...why not do nothing? I know this is not logical. This is my war with Anorexia/Bulimia. I starve myself one day in frustration and then late that night I am so overwhelmed with emotions and hunger that I binge. Then I feel guilty because I want to purge so bad but I don't and all that crap I just ate throws me back into the not eating mode. This is my war. The scale is it's weapon of mass destruction. I know I have these issues and I know I need to get them in order, but sometimes it is so overpowering. When an alcoholic walks into a bar they feel tempted and remember what it is like to be an alcoholic. Sometimes this stops them from drinking again and sometimes it is not enough. Someday I will have the will power to put an end to this cycle. One step at a time though. Talking about it and acknowledging it is a good step forward.

If this is you now or at any point in your life, know that you are not alone. I get all the time "I would have never known you had an eating disorder". This is the point. For no one to find out. The shame that lingers over you is unbearable. But in order for me to get better I need to put an end to this. I know I should be back in therapy and while this is a bad excuse it is also very true for me...I have no time and no sitter on a usual basis. I am glad that when I was in therapy she explained to me that I am not feeling this way because I am crazy but that an eating disorder I thought I was long rid of was in fact sitting inside me. Just because people are not rail thin doesn't mean they aren't sick with anorexia or bulimia; some of those people were overweight once and the disease ate them away.

I hope this helps at least one person. One person helped can pay it forward.

End of day 2!

What a FANTASTIC day! I started off the morning with a superfab breakfast that I made with no recipe. Granted it was an omelet but it was so yummy and really healthy! I then forced myself to do the 30 Day Shred again even though I was still sore from yesterday and I was so proud of myself that that feeling of accomplishment is addicting enough to keep me going. I am SO sore right now though that I can't even walk up and down my stairs without a lot of pain. So tomorrow I am lucky enough to get a massage from my good friend Bruce Kitchen (who by the way has a table and can travel-he is amazing and worth every affordable penny he charges!!). Sometime in the late afternoon tomorrow I will do yoga and give my body a little rest...but not to much hehe. The boys were fantastic today too, and Moose was just so snuggly. Poor little bug was gassy today so tonight I let him soak in his little tub for about a half hour keeping it nice and warm and rubbing his tummy. I also gave him some home made gripe water (2 cups water, boil, 1 tablespoon fennel seed, boil 15 minutes, drain, cool, serve about 1 tsp to baby) and he started belching like a man! After his bath I gave him a baby massage with his special lavender lotion for babies to help them sleep and relax (works on moms too!), rocked him for a bit and he was snoring. It felt so good that he just went right to sleep and it was not a battle like usual. I look at him and I feel so much love for him, and so grateful to Aaron for giving me this little gift. He has changed me in so many ways I didn't know needed changing.

When Aaron left this last trip, I was scared I wouldn't be able to handle everything. That adding a baby to already what is chaotic would be unbearable on my emotions. But it's so much better than I thought it was and I didn't give myself enough credit. My days are definitely busier, but not more stressful. I don't let them be. I have accepted that sometimes Kaleb has to cry for a few minutes while I get dinner thrown together or tend to the other boys. Ryley is a BIG helper though and I am so proud of him. He really loves his baby brother when Kaleb is crying Ryley sings to him and gives him his pacifier. Granted he has his 4 year old moments but more often than not he is so grown up and mature for his age. Makes me proud to be a mom when I look at him.

I am hoping tonight I sleep better than I have been. It is so hard having an empty bed when my husband has been right beside me for the last month and a half. I am going to sip on some tea and just enjoy the silence of the house....moments like these are priceless.

Jocelyn

Trying to not be discouraged!

Ok so I have been up since 2 am and CANNOT get back to sleep! I know that not enough sleep can totally mess with your weight loss and I am all ready worried because I have GAINED four blasted pounds! I would like to chalk it up to hormones and all that wonderful woman stuff I have going on now that I am 7 weeks postpartum. It is just so frustrating to jump on the scale and see a PLUS number regardless of HOW it got there!

And I am having a hard time with not feeling hungry all the time. I am very active as a mother of 3 and I work out so I am thinking that that is why I feel hungry every couple hours. I am getting my required amount of water so I know it is not because I am thirsty.

If you are going through these issues too, you are not alone!

Jocelyn

End of the day recap!

Well, today went amazingly well! I will admit, during my workout I didn't think I was going to be able to finish or live to tell the tale of it, but I pushed through and boy am I feeling it now YIKES! I just pray that I can get out of bed in the morning =) I am going to try and take a nice hot bath tonight but we shall see.

I think my biggest struggle and concern right now is my schedule. Right now I am doing great and able to fit things in but being a SAHM of three kids, one being only 7 weeks old, I am afraid I am going to get derailed by being overwhelmed! I start school full time January 10th (online classes) and I am not a very good student. I will have to study A LOT on top of homework. I know that i need to make priorities and get over certain quirks of mine. Having a clean house is one thing, having a Martha Stewart clean house is probably never going to happen again. I need to realize I can't be Super Mom and some days my house my be a little messy. I know this but will I be able to do it in the end?

I will just take it one day at a time. One hill at a time. I won't start thinking about the hurdles I MIGHT run into before I have even landed my jump from the first hurdle. I think worrying about the what ifs and worrying IF I am going to fail WILL make me fail. I need to start KNOWING I can do this and telling myself everyday I will achieve all my goals. I am lucky to have a wonderful husband who supports me in everything I do!! Now to get the kids ready and tucked into bed. And maybe I can get that soak in ;)

Jocelyn

Pushing through is more rewarding than giving up!

So there has been a forum thread (on Sparkpeople.com) in regards to Jillian Michaels 30 day shred workout DVD. I have owned it for over a year now and the first time (and only time might I add) that I had tried it, it almost killed me...and I only did the first FIVE minutes! Granted I was having some serious health problems, but it was still a blow. I was SO discouraged that I never picked it up again. In fact I let my mother borrow it and a part of me hoped she wouldn't give it back so that I would never have to face Jillian again! Well, my mom DID give it back and it just sat between Leslie Sanson Walk Away the Pounds and Dance It Off workout. Shortly after my failed attempted of this butt kicking workout, my husband and I got pregnant (why do we humans always say WE got pregnant...I am pretty sure it was ME carrying the baby...but anyways) and therefore I couldn't even get off the couch I was so tired and sick. I am 7 weeks postpartum and after reading how everyone else was mastering Miss Jillian, I thought, hey what the heck, kick my butt again. I would have been happy with doing 6 minutes (one minute longer than the first time!). But I didn't do six minutes...I DID THE ENTIRE 20 MINUTES! All of Level One with NO stopping, NO dying, NO puking...but I did sweat more than I ever have in my life. I am so beyond proud of myself that I have to tell you...the reward of pushing myself to finish was much greater than the reward of not keeling over when I stopped. You CAN do it, you just have to put your mind to it and push through! YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE!

Jocelyn

Way to early to be this awake!!

Oh how my life drabbles on! My days are starting to run together and my eyes are open more at night than they should be. While I would like to chalk it up to being a mother of three children, one of which is only 7 weeks old, I can't. It's all me. The baby sleeps wonderfully and only wakes up once a night, which is actually not until about 5 in the morning. This would be perfect if I could sleep. I could probably sleep if my brain came with an off button so that I can stop thinking of all the stresses and ideas of life. I sleep great when my husband is home, but he is gone more than he is home.

The last few days I feel like I am nonstop going and you think with all the going I would be so exhausted by the end of the day I just conk out. Wrong. End of the day, all kids are sleeping, and I am laying in my bed thinking about recipes, school, the next project I want to work on, and things I need to add to my to-list. I just can't shut my brain off. And I can't take those wonderful sleeping pills for I fear I would sleep TOO well and not hear the baby cry.

I wish with all this energy and enthusiasm I could get farther along on my NANOWRIMO. I seriously have 1700ish words. *facepalm*. I am in a major writers block. I bet if I erased 500 of those words and started over I would be in better shape, but then by the off chance it doesn't work, I just deleted 500 words for no reason. Oh the ponders of life as a writer.

My husband has been gone one week as of today. Major suckage. I miss him a great deal...even though he excels at driving me batty when he is home. I get sleep though when he is home. I just curl up next to him and I am out in two minutes.

I wish I had more time to clean my house up. I am starting to feel like an episode of hoarders. My back living room is a disaster with all my craft supplies, papers, the kids home school stuff, etc. And I hate those random papers that you do not want to toss, but where do you put them if you keep them?! I just need to make that a priority today because once I start my online classes in January I will need that space to actually sit at the computer and do homework. Without having to clear a spot first. I would like to try and use my craft table too for homework since I can use the computer chair to sit there and that is a lot nicer on my hind end than the dining room chairs.

I cannot believe that it is November already! It is that time of year for me to get all the Christmas presents going so that I do not have to worry about it. In terms of shopping I am all done. I just have some handmade gifts I want to give out this year and I need to get started on that....but I am having troubles with my damn sewing machine. I am about to stick it in a box and forget about it. Or sell it. Something. I really am too irritated with it now to figure out what is wrong because I have tried EVERYTHING.

I wish my house was this quiet more often. Everyone is sleeping but me....I hate that the baby went right back to sleep after his feeding but I just laid in bed until finally I was so bored here I am on my blog. With nothing all that important to say.

Yes, I am boring today. I will try harder next post.

I am going to raid my kitchen for something yummy for breakfast!!

Jocelyn

Deliciousness!

Out of all the things on my wish list, I finally got one! It is the most beautiful thing in my house. Other than my children, of course. A 5qt Kitchenaid Mixer! I wish I could take the credit for it's new permanent address, but the reality is SO much better. My MIL bought it for me for a birthday/wedding anniversary/Christmas present, and it is the most BRILLIANT idea to do so. I have all these cooking and baking dreams stirring inside screaming at me. Yesterday was a wonderful day to try and muffle the screaming because we celebrated Thanksgiving yesterday. With Aaron leaving today (at an UNGODLY hour of morning might I add) and him being gone for 60 days I wanted to try and give him a nice going away gift, and I thought celebrating a holiday he would otherwise miss would be great. Thank you mixer for assisting me with a pumpkin pie (my first pumpkin pie too!!!), snickerdoodles for Aaron to take to work with him, and of course, you cannot have Thanksgiving without mashed potatoes. Now I need one of those ovens with two sections so I can bake/cook even MORE! In any case, the snickerdoodles were the best I have ever made! It was a delicious and easy recipe. So I thought I would share!

I got these off of MarthaStewart.com